Pondering Jonathan’s friendship to David prompted me to
challenge the men of Grace Fellowship Church to actively seek male-to-male
friendships. I gave my brothers some quick advice on how to do it and here it is for
you.
1. Aristotle said, “He who has many friends, has none.”
There is truth in what he was saying if you understand him to mean that a man
who has a thousand shallow relationships is much poorer than the one who has a
few deep ones. David had only Jonathan.
Sure, he had the mighty men and all, but there was something unique
about his relationship to Jonathan. True friends are rare, so don’t get tricked
into thinking quantity is the same as quality.
2. Loyalty and love go together. You will not develop deep
friendships until you learn to live loyally. I have sinned against every one of
my best friends and I cannot imagine how the relationship would have survived
if they had not been loyal, like Jonathan was to David. Learn loyalty now by,
well, being loyal!
3. Initiate. Why do men sit around watching football instead
of calling up a brother and building a friendship? Stop waiting around for
somebody else to pursue you and act like a man – initiate.
4. Fear of man destroys friendships. If you are not dealing
with your heart idolatries you will have a hard time building deeply into
another’s life. Be the best Christian you can be and God may provide a very
good friend.
5. Never lose sight of the Friend of Sinners. He will teach
you all you need to know about befriending other men.
